Channel 4: screw-ups continue

It’s weird what’s happening at Channel 4. A channel which began as the most innovative and interesting experiment in modern broadcasting history has become unbelievably tacky. Following on the fiasco of the racist exchanges on Big Brother comes this.

Graphic images of the car crash that killed Diana, Princess of Wales, are to be made public for the first time next week in a Channel 4 documentary that has been condemned as ‘grossly intrusive’ and bound to cause distress to Princes William and Harry.

One photograph shows Diana receiving oxygen from a French doctor, Frederic Mailliez, who had been travelling in the other direction and who had not yet realised the identity of his famous patient. It is clear that the princess has been thrown forward into the footwell behind the driver’s seat. At the front of the car, a passing student is shown trying to help Trevor Rees-Jones, Diana’s bodyguard….

My mate Tony Holden, who knows about these things, is quoted in the same article as saying:

‘It’s grossly intrusive and beyond the bounds of anything remotely tasteful, and will no doubt upset her sons enormously.’

Holden said he was aware that such pictures existed but that the media had acted responsibly in self-censoring them. ‘One has heard about British journalists looking at them and not only refusing to publish them but wiping them from the system so people in the office could not be voyeuristic. I didn’t think anyone would sink so low as to broadcast or publish them,’ he said.

My guess is that there’s something seriously wrong with the top management in Channel 4. Luke Johnston Johnson, the Chairman, is a restaurant entrepreneur, not a broadcaster. Andy Duncan, the Chief Executive, is a cheeky chappie who goes around dressed like a financially-challenged undergraduate. Both seem to have tin ears for public disquiet. Both probably believe that there’s no such thing as bad publicity. They’re wrong.

Why would anyone want to buy EMI?

Apparently, people do. Richard Wachman has a good piece explaining both the problems and the opportunities of the music business.

It has taken this long for the record companies to fight back by collaborating with legal downloading sites such as iTunes in a bid to offset lost revenue from plummeting CD sales. But internet piracy is still costing them billions a year and the recorded-music arms of the majors look to be in terminal decline.

According to the IFPI, the international music industry lobby group, 40 songs are being downloaded illegally for every legal download. Put another way, they say 20 billion songs were downloaded illegally in 2006 and the situation is set to worsen following the spread of broadband to eastern Europe and other emerging markets.

The effect of piracy on the industry has been to spur consolidation as the big players scramble to cut costs by merging with each other. There are now only four major music groups: Universal, Sony/BMG, EMI and Warner Music.

Last week, British-based EMI, which has been struggling with falling profitability for years, said it was recommending to shareholders a takeover approach from Terra Firma, the private equity group headed by Guy Hands, which only last month tried unsuccessfully to bid for Alliance Boots…

Apple’s lesson for Sony’s stores

Randall Stross has a perceptive NYT piece about the difference between Apple’s retail stores and Sony’s:

Last Sunday, I set out to have a look for myself. I began at Sony’s flagship in San Francisco, at the Metreon Center, the shopping and entertainment complex. The mall was crowded, but Sony’s store, measuring an enormous 20,000 square feet, was all but deserted. The two uniformed members of the store security staff matched the number of customers I could see browsing the store’s wares.

Then I headed for the Stanford Shopping Center in Palo Alto, where I could see a Sony Style store compete almost directly across from an Apple retail store. The weather was gorgeous, drawing the usual weekend throng to the shopping center.

Sony’s mall store was long and large — 6,000 square feet — and filled with curvy panels and chirpy taglines like “My Style” on the walls and plush theater nooks. Here, too, the sales staff seemed to outnumber customers.

A group of five young salesmen and saleswomen who stood near the door when I entered were so engaged in a private, and apparently amusing, discussion that my imploring presence failed to draw anyone’s attention. The only other customers in the store were at the far other end, near the PlayStations. I suppose that the employees near me had become accustomed to busying themselves with their own entertainments.

A few yards away was the Apple store, which is one of Apple’s newer “mini” stores, introduced in 2004 and only about an eighth the size of Sony’s Stanford store. It was simplicity itself: a rectangular space with products lining the two sides, laptops placed on a small table, open space taking up most of the room, and, of course, the Genius Bar. The store was packed, yet the sales people were alert and attentive…

He’s right. There’s a Sony store in Cambridge (see above) and it generally seems pretty deserted. The photograph shows four staff and no customers. In contrast, I’ve never seen an Apple store that wasn’t packed. Among other things, there’s the fact that Apple provides what amounts to a free Internet cafe.

It’s strange to see the way the two companies have switched roles. Sony dominated the market for chic gadgets for decades (the Walkman, remember, was the iPod of its day). Now Sony has become, somehow, pathetic.

Caught in the grip of geekvision

This morning’s Observer column

I’m watching a video stream from downtown San Francisco. It’s 1am there. The video is shot from inside a car. An idiotic music channel is pumping audiopap through the vehicle’s stereo system. The driver has recently pulled into a fast food outlet and ordered a chocolate milkshake and a steakburger. Now we’re back on the road. I’ve no idea where the car is headed. The driver has a companion, with whom he exchanges genial but low-key wisecracks…

Bertie wins again

Now that all the votes are counted in the Irish General Election, here’s the result:

The final state of the parties is: Fianna Fáil 78; Fine Gael 51; Labour 20; PDs 2; Green Party 6; Sinn Féin 4 and Others 5.

So Fianna Fail — once memorably (and accurately) described as “the political wing of the construction industry” — wins again. They’re five seats short of an absolute majority, so a coalition is inevitable. I’m not surprised by the result: the country is so drunk on prosperity that it was very unlikely voters would opt to change the regime. The really good news is that Sinn Fein failed to make the electoral headway that was once predicted for it. I had a nightmare vision of Adams & Co holding the balance of power in a hung Dail (parliament).

Big Brother

Accurate, stinging assessment by Marina Hyde of Channel 4’s ludicrous hypocrisy about those racist interludes on the last series of Big Brother…

The overriding sense one gets from reading the report and listening to the various reactions of involved parties is the staggering and unabashed contempt in which the viewer is held. In Martin Amis’s novel Yellow Dog, the staff on the tabloid it features refer to readers, quite straightfacedly and at all times, as “wankers”. A circulation dip means the paper has “lost wankers”. A new feature called “Wankers’ Wives” is suggested. As record complaints banked up at Channel 4 in January, one can honestly imagine executives rubbing their hands with glee that another load of “wankers” had stoked the ratings even higher.

Naturally the channel’s director of television, Kevin Lygo, was careful to avoid creating this precise impression when mouthing a few platitudes following Thursday’s judgment. But perhaps he’d care to revisit the interview he granted to Broadcast magazine in late January – several days after he had been privately notified of the incidents that have now come to light – in which he explained that the race row had saved the show from being dull.

“This was in danger of being the most boring Big Brother that we’d had in many years, maybe even ever,” he prattled to the trade journal, whose readers are presumably deemed savvy enough to “get” how this kind of controversy can be a good thing. He added that Channel 4 had “made the right decisions all the time”.

Positively wafting off the pages of Ofcom’s report is the sense that both Channel 4’s and Endemol’s cultures are terminally introverted and smug. Yet both companies’ delusions of even basic professional competence should be shattered by their staff’s apparent inability to distinguish between media mischief and entirely justified suspicions on behalf of the people who pay their wages that four venal halfwits had been bandying about the word “Paki” in the name of light entertainment…

I’m not a sycophant, says Randall

Jeff Randall, former Business Editor of the BBC (and a very good one he was too) is offended by our report. He thinks that members of the panel have no sense of humour and failed to spot his sophisticated use of irony and sarcasm.

During the interview, broadcast on Five Live on December 3 2006, Mr Randall, now the Daily Telegraph’s editor-at-large, asked Mr Murdoch a question about the future of new technology, such as high-definition television.

Mr Murdoch replied with a list of Sky’s achievements – prompting Mr Randall to congratulate him sarcastically on giving a great sales pitch for Sky and a free advert on the BBC.

We commented that “the interview with James Murdoch (December 3 2006) also appeared sycophantic when the presenter congratulated Mr Murdoch’s pronouncements about the future of his company as the best sales pitch he had heard.”

The Guardian reports Jeff’s astonishment that his comment had been taken seriously.

“That was a sarcastic comment. I can’t believe the listeners would have failed to spot it,” he hold MediaGuardian.co.uk.

“I was having a pop at an interviewee who failed to answer the question,” Mr Randall said.

Hmmm… I’m tempted to borrow Simon Hoggart’s crack about Gordon Brown and say that Jeff Randall — who is a great ornament to his profession but approaches it much as sportswriters approach Premiership football — does irony the way Alex Ferguson does self-doubt.

Thanks to Bill Thompson for spotting the story.

Facebook enters phase of exponential growth

Watch out, MySpace. Facebook’s on the rise. Interesting Yahoo! News report about Facebook opening up to third-party developers as well as non-graduates.

After the site opened up registration to non-college students last September, it evolved into a major social networking destination to rival MySpace.com, owned by Rupert Murdoch’s media conglomerate News Corp.

Facebook now has more than 24 million users who have logged on in the past 30 days. Venture capital firms including Accel Partners have contributed more than $35 million.

Critics say Facebook — which is getting more than 100,000 new registrations per day — can’t maintain its scorching growth rate. Others worry that [founder Mark] Zuckerberg and the company’s other 20-something technophiles lack the experience and credibility to turn the site into a profitable, publicly traded company.

On Thursday in San Francisco, Zuckerberg — who sported a fleece jacket, baggy jeans and flip-flops — seemed well aware of the challenges ahead. Technical gaffes dogged his nearly hour-long speech, and he broke out in a visible sweat.

“We’re the sixth most trafficked site in the U.S. and we can’t seem to get our act together,” Zuckerberg joked as he fumbled to synchronize his presentation slides, which were in disarray.

After laughs from the crowd, he regained his composure and added, “We recently passed eBay in traffic and we’re working on passing Google, too.”

Economist: cyberwar reassessed

Good piece pondering the implications of the assault on Estonia.

Even at their crudest, the assaults broke new ground. For the first time, a state faced a frontal, anonymous attack that swamped the websites of banks, ministries, newspapers and broadcasters; that hobbled Estonia’s efforts to make its case abroad. Previous bouts of cyberwarfare have been far more limited by comparison: probing another country’s internet defences, rather as a reconnaissance plane tests air defences.

At full tilt, the onslaught on Estonia was also of a sophistication not seen before, with tactics shifting as weaknesses emerged. “Particular ‘ports’ of particular mission-critical computers in, for example, the telephone exchanges were targeted. Packet ‘bombs’ of hundreds of megabytes in size would be sent first to one address, then another,” says Linnar Viik, Estonia’s top internet guru. Such efforts exceed the skills of individual activists or even organised crime; they require the co-operation of a state and a large telecoms firm, he says. The effects could have been life-threatening. The emergency number used to call ambulances and the fire service was out of action for more than an hour.

For many countries, the events of the past weeks have been a loud wake-up call. Estonia, one of the most wired nations in Europe, actually survived pretty well. Other countries would have fared worse, NATO specialists reckon…

IMHO, this is a really big deal. I can’t understand why governments appear to be paying so little attention to it. And I’m astonished that it has taken so long for an attack to materialise. Years ago I wrote that Saddam Hussein should stop wasting his efforts on WMD and hire some hackers instead. I guess he didn’t read the Observer. Just as well, maybe.

That generation gap I was talking about

From Guardian Unlimited Technology

A friend has two children aged 11 and 16. He explains: “The latest thing in Surrey right now is downloading high-pitched tones that only children can hear [the 17kHz “Mosquito”] on to their mobiles, Bluetoothing them around, and then starting up a cacophony in lessons – they can hear it and double up in agony, but their teacher can’t.” It’s a metaphor for the adult/child gap: the children can recognise what the grownups can’t.