Er, it’s St Patrick’s Day. More importantly, Sinn Fein have not been invited to the White House and the McCartney family have. And of course it’s Cheltenham week. Sue and I used to go every year with a group of friends. We had a rule that if anyone had a winner in a race, they had to buy a bottle of champagne at the end of the race. On one unforgettable day we had six bottles. Ah, those were the days… (dozes off into daydream about the time when marmalade was thicker and 640k of RAM was enough for anyone.)

What? (Shakes himself abruptly) Where was I? Oh, yes, I remember. People are always attributing to Bill Gates the quote that “640k should be enough for anyone”. But Gates has vehemently denied that he said it. And, for once, I believe him.