The number of dames claiming to have discussed Ugandan affairs with Tiger Woods grows daily and now stands at nine, at least according to ABC News.

I suppose it shows how naive I am, but I’m genuinely astonished by this unfolding story. I’m fascinated by golf but never really warmed to Woods. He always seemed so, well, boring and controlled: a golfing automaton. He’s the last man in the world I’d have suspected of hanging out with porn stars and night-club hostesses.

Francis Bacon had a nice aphorism for Tiger’s current plight: “He doth like the ape, that the higher he climbed the more he showed his arse.”

It’d be interesting to be a fly on the wall at the moment in the ad agency that handles the Accenture account. They made such a big deal of Tiger’s invincible, calm, rational image

LATER: This from the Irish Times:

Companies whose endorsements have helped make Woods perhaps the world’s richest athlete, with a fortune estimated at $1 billion, have said they are standing by him.

Oh yeah?